Martin Remy

The strength of “I don’t know”

I had a professor in grad school who sometimes threw erasers at students. Paul Halmos was from that generation of reluctant Hungarian émigrés who made big contributions to science and computing in the US during and after World War II (and, yes, atomic weapons – although Halmos didn’t work on those, as far as I know). I was lucky to have taken classes with him late in his career.

Besides affectionately pelting students with erasers, Halmos had another, more laudable habit.  He’d write a theorem on the board, turn to the class and say, “How do we prove this? … I have no idea! … Let’s get started!”  Of course he knew the proof, but by saying “I have no idea”, he got our attention and turned us from passive scribblers into active participants.

The smartest person in the room doesn’t always need to have the answers, even if they think they do. By being comfortable saying “I don’t know,” you

  • Welcome other perspectives or even dissent.
  • Enlarge the solution space.
  • Defeat a culture of fear or disagreeing with “leadership”.
  • Create space for the quiet smart ones in the room.

Model this for your team, even if you think you have the answer. You might be surprised at what you learn.

Photo of Paul Halmos by George Bergman from Wikipedia

2 responses to “The strength of “I don’t know””

  1. Alex Bendig Avatar
    Alex Bendig

    Leaning into not knowing, not being certain is so valuable, but also pretty counterintuitive, I think. Per Daniel Kahneman, “A remarkable aspect of your mental life is that you are rarely stumped.

    Since you are bringing up AI products – they actually reflect that bias beautifully. They seem to generally insist on having an answer, rarely if ever admitting not knowing.

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    1. Martin Remy Avatar
      Martin Remy

      Per Daniel Kahneman, “A remarkable aspect of your mental life is that you are rarely stumped.

      Yeah, we can usually spit out an answer, like LLMs (with or without reasoning). I think the value I’m trying to articulate is two-fold:

      1. Sometimes expressing uncertainty as a way to signal openness to others’ opinions is very helpful (even for LLMs, but it is rare unless prompted). Even if I’m not stumped, but I have a vague sense that I might be missing something potentially important about a decision.

      2. Sometimes fabricating uncertainty for yourself is helpful: “How might I be wrong about this?” is a question people should ask themselves more often. Not as comprehensive or morbid as a full pre-mortem, but as a way to shake us out of that un-stump-able rut.

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